i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize