dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
