fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize