Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Life is so much better after having sex.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
