Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
