I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
porn star boner night. come get it.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
