Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
