i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
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