Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I bet he comes in French.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
