Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
