Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Randomize
