new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
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