I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize