I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
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