Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
