vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
