It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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