I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
