This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
