hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
