It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
