just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
