Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize