no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
