I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize