Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i think i have herpe
just one?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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