the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
