Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize