People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
