Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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