My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
