Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize