doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
nutella sex= disaster
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
