Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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