Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
