No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
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