I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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