I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Dicks are not precious.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize