I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
my sisters under your porch take her home
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
