Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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