i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Randomize