how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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