1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
