Tell her she can't have a vagina
you didnt know i had herpes?
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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