i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
do herpes really smell.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Randomize
