I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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