Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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