glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize