So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
