I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
time to smoke my breakfast
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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