She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
